My role
My role
Going, going, gone. These outrageous sunglasses that have caused offence the length and breath of the nation wherever fine attire is appreciated will shortly be on their way to the great recycling plant in the sky.
MHF Men's Health Week organiser Matthew Maycock, who has made a spectacle of himself in these designer disasters for long enough, promised that he would sell them if he raised more than £500 in sponsorship for the Forum through running the Great North Run last autumn.
Regular readers will recall that seeing the writing was on the wall for his shambolic shades, Matt feigned injury to avoid participating and thus keep hold of his precious polaroids a little longer. But the half-marathon season finally caught up with Forum's stiff-legged staffer and this week-end he was honour bound to 'compete' in the Sussex Downs Half Marathon around Brighton.
Clutching his heart, a breathless Maycock said after tying his shoelaces completing the run: 'It was a pretty painful (especially the hill near the end), but I finished in 1524th place in 1 hour 51 mins, which was under my target time of 1hour 55 mins.
'The race was around Brighton, principally along the sea front - 5,000 people were running. Next time I definitely aim to get below 1hour 45 mins, with hopefully fewer blisters at the end.' A fine advert for men's health, indeed, as the pictures, left, amply illustrate.
The photos were supplied by the participant as 'evidence' of his run. A likely story — anyone can turn up wrapped in bacofoil and claim to have run a half marathon, Matt.
However, MHF CEO Peter Baker claims: 'I met Matt straight after the race and he looked like he'd run 126 miles! It was a huge achievement — and that's just my successfully driving into Brighton on a Sunday!
'Seriously, it was an awe-inspiring spectacle.' (I bet it was — Ed.)
Peter went on: 'Matt did fantastically well, not just for himself but for the MHF. He was wearing a MHF T-Shirt too, so he really flew the flag for us.'
Hmm, the whole thing has a very nasty smell about it — and I'm not just talking about Matt's socks.
Anyway, there are now two ways that you can help Matt rescue his dignity raise money for the Forum.
It's not too late to sponsor him or you can place a bid for the sunglasses which are now on sale on eBay. Auction ends 27 Feb.
Note: the shades were finally sold for £2.10! Not a great windfall for the Forum but £2.20 more than they were worth.